Listening

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8:40am Service | 10:00 Service | 11:20 Service | Sermon Audio

Once upon a time there was a married couple. They had a nice home; they had a baby; they shared the same faith. But something was not right in their marriage. As harsh as this sounds, they didn’t enjoy spending time together. They always found a reason to postpone date night; they never went on vacation alone. And they couldn’t figure out what was wrong. So they finally went for marriage counseling, and within one session, the counselor put her finger on the problem: it was all about their communication. Actually, there was lots of communication in the marriage…but it all went one way. See, the husband was a big talker. He was in sales, so he was a good talker. He would talk to his wife about his day, and his opinions, and his plans. He talked a lot. And he wasn’t a mean guy; he had just never learned how to listen. And over time, she realized it just wasn’t worth it to try, so she pretty much didn’t talk. And the relationship went cold.  

So the counselor challenged this guy. She said, “Every time you’re about to say something, stop for a minute. And ask your wife to share about her day, or her thoughts, or her concerns. And then just listen.” So it takes a while to learn new habits, but sure enough, as the guy learned how to listen, the marriage actually became a relationship. And they entered into a season of marriage that became far more enjoyable than it had ever been before. 

So…last week we started a series on prayer, and I so appreciate how Pastor Paul began the series. Because he reminded us that prayer is not a magic formula that you chant; it’s not a religious duty; it’s an actual relationship with a personal being. And we all know that relationships involve both speaking and…what? Listening! That’s, like, Relationships 101, right? But for some reason, when it comes to our relationship with God, we struggle with that concept. So our prayer life consists of us talking…and us talking…and us talking. And that gets old fast…which is why some of us don’t pray much. 

So: what would it mean to have a relationship with God where you not only talk; you also listen? Let’s start by going to the Psalms. In many ways, the Psalms teach us how to pray. And it’s really interesting the way the Book of Psalms begins. So, Psalm 1—this is God’s Word for us today… 

1 Blessed is the one 
    who does not walk in step with the wicked 
or stand in the way that sinners take 
    or sit in the company of mockers, 
2 but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, 
    and who meditates on his law day and night. 
3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, 
    which yields its fruit in season 
and whose leaf does not wither— 
    whatever they do prospers. 

4 Not so the wicked! 
    They are like chaff 
    that the wind blows away. 
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, 
    nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous. 

6 For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous, 
    but the way of the wicked leads to destruction. This is the Word of the Lord. 

Let’s talk first about Why We Should Listen. Years ago, I learned something from a teacher named Paul Tripp. He said if you look at the creation story in Genesis, and you read about the third day, when God created the trees, what did he say to them? Does anyone remember? Did he say to the trees, “I want you to stand there, like this…And grow leaves”? Actually, God didn’t say anything to the trees. When God created fish, what did He say to them? “Now, I want you to swim around, and go like this…” He said nothing to the fish. Did God say to the cats, “Now I want you to be aloof and arrogant and nasty?” No—they’re just naturally like that. God didn’t speak to them…or to the reptiles…or the birds.  

But then God created humans. And for the first time, you know what happened? He spoke to them. He told them to be fruitful, and multiply, and take care of the earth, etc. And from that time on, all through the Bible, you see God communicating with people. So here’s the point: in all of creation, the only creature that was designed to receive revelation from God was…humans. So think about this: if I wake up and go through my day, day after day, without listening to God’s voice, I am violating my design. Does that make sense? I’m reducing myself to a subhuman level. Because as humans, we have the unique privilege of being able to listen to the voice of God. What an honor! 

In his book on prayer, Tim Keller wrote this: “Christian prayer is not slipping into sub-conscious contemplation; it is fellowship with the personal God who befriends us through speech.” So what does it mean for us to listen to God speaking? 

Well, at the very beginning of Psalm 1, the Psalm writer says Blessed is the one… The word that’s translated “blessed” is a Hebrew word that can also be translated “happy.” And the whole Psalm is contrasting two different ways that people pursue happiness. Verse 1 talks about people who walk in step with the wicked, stand in the way of sinners, and sit in the company of mockers. In other words, pursuing happiness without God. Or, we can choose another way—verse 2:  

but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, 
    and who meditates on his law day and night. 

Whenever you see “the law of the Lord,” that means the written Word of God. Scripture. Blessed is the one who delights in Scripture. Isn’t that interesting? Two choices: pursue happiness apart from God, or pursue your happiness in God, and the way you can tell if you’re seeking happiness in God is the way you relate to his written Word. Why? Because God’s Word is like an extension of himself. In the New Testament it says that all Scripture is “God-breathed”—think about that—the very breath of God! So even though God worked through human authors to write Scripture, He so guided that process that the result was His very thoughts on the page. It perfectly represents his character and his will. So therefore, listen: the way we regard God’s Word is the way we regard Him.  

So let’s bring this back to prayer: prayer is a relationship, and a relationship involves both speaking and listening, and the way we listen to God is primarily through Scripture. Now: does God sometimes speak to us directly through his Holy Spirit? Yes. Does God sometimes speak to us through other people, or through circumstances, or through nature? Sure. But the primary way and the most reliable way that God speaks to us is when the Spirit of God takes the Word of God and presses it into our hearts.  

If we don’t do that—if we say, “Nah—I’m just going to pray. I don’t have time for Scripture,” then our whole prayer life will be stunted and ingrown. The great Puritan pastor, John Owen, said it like this: “Without the light of Scripture, our best and most noble efforts to love Christ and be like him only result in stupidities of the highest order.” You’ve got to love a trash-talking Puritan. But he’s right! Without Scriptures, our prayers will be shaped by only our priorities and our imagination, which is so limited. Scripture stretches us and shapes us and changes the way we pray. 

And therefore, when we think about prayer, let’s stop thinking about it as a monologue where we make a speech to God. Right? And let’s start thinking of prayer as an actual conversation where we open the Scriptures expecting God to speak to us in very personal ways. So we listen first! And then our prayer flows out of that listening. To quote Tim Keller again: “Prayer is continuing a conversation that God has started through his Word and his grace, which eventually becomes a full encounter with him.” 

Ok. Sounds great, right? But how do you actually do this? Let’s talk about How We Should Listen. Recently I had a long day at the office. So I finally packed up at around 6:45, and I was starved. But I was on my own—Norma Jean was out with a friend, and no one else was around for dinner. But just as I was leaving, Norma Jean sent me a text: “I made some dinner for you.” Yes. So I got home, and there it was on the stove, in the wok: chicken with Indian spices, sautéed with onions and mushrooms. Anyone feeling that? And on the counter was the rice maker, filled with steaming rice. So I know I talk about the joy of family dinners, but this was the joy of just me and my food. So I made a plate, I went and turned on ESPN—the game was just starting—and I took the first bite—perfect mix of rice and chicken and mushrooms and onions and sauce. And I just savored the flavors and the texture and warmth and the spice.  

Why am I telling you this? Because this is how God invites us to approach his Word. As I ate that food, it became part of me. As I chewed it and savored it, I was warmed and filled. And Scripture can have the same effect on our souls. Psalm 1, verse 2 talks about “delighting in the law of the Lord” like I delighted in that food. Jesus said, “Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.” The Word of God can be as satisfying as food. 

And the biblical term for this is meditation. Some people get nervous when they hear that word. Because they immediately connect it with Hinduism and Buddhism and Transcendental Meditation. But it’s radically different, and here’s the difference: in Eastern religions—pantheistic religions—meditation means you empty your mind. In biblical meditation, you fill your mind with the Word of God. Look again at Psalm 1, verse 2: 

but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, 
    and who meditates on his law day and night. 

Blessed is the person—happy is the person—who does this. Who doesn’t just quickly skim a few verses while he’s throwing back his morning coffee: “Got my Bible reading done for the day!” But instead, who lingers over it and savors it like I savored that curry chicken with rice. Who gets the flavor out of it, and lets it permeate their being. In the words of Colossians 3:16, you let the word of Christ dwell richly in you. That’s meditation. And that’s when it starts to change us. 

I love this quote from Eugene Peterson: 

Reading Scripture is not the same as listening to God. When I read a book the book does not know if I am paying attention or not; when I listen to a person the person knows very well whether I am paying attention or not…I can read by myself; I cannot listen by myself.  

So here’s the mental shift we have to make: when you open the Bible, don’t think of it as reading the Word of God; think of it as listening to the voice of God. God is actually there, in that moment, speaking to you through those words. That’s an amazing thought isn’t it? And when you view it like that, you savor it and chew on it and think about it…because you don’t want to miss a thing.  

So let me get even more practical. All through this series I’m going to encourage you to spend time with God in the morning. I know that’s hard for some of your schedules, but I’m still going to urge you to do everything you can to make it work. So imagine it’s tomorrow morning; you get up early; if you’re like me, you need some time to drink coffee and wake up, which I do while checking news and playing a few online word games. So now you’re awake, and you remember that you’re not just “saying prayers;” you’re pursuing an actual relationship with God, and relationships involve both speaking and listening. And you want to honor God by listening first. How do you do that?  

I know Pastor Paul showed you some samples from his prayer journal last week. Apparently he likes to draw ducks and things like that. Actually, I loved seeing the samples from his journal, because it shows that people are different—Paul and I are different. He uses his journal in ways that help him hear God more clearly, and that’s what this is about.  

So let me show you a simplified page from my prayer journal—this is from a few weeks ago, and I did re-write it to make it more legible and understandable, but this is a very good representation of what I do each morning. That morning I was in Psalm 107. So I began by quieting my heart and praying that God would speak to me through the Word. And then I slowly read the Psalm. And my first step in meditating was to read back over the Psalm and write a little summary. So here was my summary:  

“Features 4 examples of God’s faithful deliverance of those who cry out to him in calamity: Some wandered in deserts. Some sat in darkness. Some became fools through rebellion. Some went out on the sea. In each case they face danger/scarcity/death—sometimes through foolishness/sin, sometimes not. Each time, they cry out to the Lord and he delivers them. Each example ends with the refrain: Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds to mankind.” 

So that’s just literally a summary of what’s in the passage. And then I started chewing on it—thinking deeply about it, with the desire to hear God’s voice through it. Through that time of meditation, here’s what I wrote down:  

-“Crying out” implies desperation, humility, faith—the opposite of self-reliance/pride. 
-How often is crying out my last option, instead of my first? 
-When Jesus cried out from the cross he was not rescued/delivered…he was judged for my sin, so there is nothing blocking God’s ears from my cry. 

And I just sat with that for a while, in silence. So now I’m 15 minutes into my time with God, and I really haven’t spoken much. All I’ve done is read Scripture and thought deeply about it. In other words, I’ve listened. And that’s meditation. Soren Kierkegaard said, “When you read God’s Word, you must constantly be saying to yourself, ‘It is talking to me, and about me.’” That doesn’t mean you’re the hero of the story or the star; it means all Scripture applies to your life in one way or another. And God uses it to speak to you in very specific ways. But you only hear his voice when you slow down enough to listen.  

So maybe your method of journaling will look more like Paul’s; maybe it will look more like mine; maybe you will never ever use a journal. That’s fine—but find a way to slow down and listen and savor and meditate on what God is saying to you through the Word. It’s so worth it. 

As you develop that habit, what effect will that have? Let’s talk about that: What Happens When We Listen. Two big things. First of all, It changes our prayers. The Puritan writer Thomas Manton said, “The word feeds meditation, and meditation feeds prayer…Meditation must follow hearing and precede prayer…What we take in by the Word we digest by meditation and let out by prayer.” So you see the sequence? Read the Word, meditate on the Word, and then you’re really ready to pray. I’m not saying we can never just pray, without reading the Bible first. We should pray all the time. But in those set-apart times that we meet with God, it’s so wise to intentionally listen. The more we do that, our prayers will be shaped by what we’re hearing from God.  

So back to my journal page from March 31: my final step is to write a very simple, one sentence prayer, asking God for the grace to live out what’s in the passage. Sometimes I make the prayer a little poetic, because I’ll remember it much better. So here was my prayer for that day: Lord, when life is hard and I don’t know what to do, make me a man who cries out to you.” Can you see how that comes directly from the passage? Can you see how that’s short and memorable? I can remember that. And that’s the prayer that I write in the Notes app on my phone, and I take it with my on my 2-mile prayer walk. Now, obviously I pray for much more than just that. But that little, Scripture-based prayer becomes the core of what I pray that day for myself and for others. 

So…choosing to listen to God radically changes the way we pray. I’ll fill in a few more details about my devotional approach in the final message of this series. But the point for today is that when we listen first, it changes our prayers, for the better.  

But it does more than that. When we listen to God, It changes our life. Let’s finish where we started—in Psalm 1. Look again at verses 3 and 4: 

3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, 
    which yields its fruit in season 
and whose leaf does not wither— 
    whatever they do prospers. 

4 Not so the wicked! 
    They are like chaff 
    that the wind blows away. 

So remember: Psalm 1 is contrasting two ways of pursuing happiness: with God or without God. And here’s the bottom line: if you seek happiness in God by meditating on his Word, you’ll be like a tree; if you seek happiness apart from God, you’ll be like chaff. What is chaff? When you harvest certain grains, they’re not usable right away, because they have a husk around them. So you thresh the grain—which means you beat it, which loosens up the husk. And then you winnow the grain—which means you toss it up into the air; the heavy grain falls back down, but that husk blows away in the wind. And that worthless husk is also known as…guess what? Chaff. Lightweight. Useless. So here’s the question: is your life more like a tree, or more like chaff? It comes out in two ways. 

First, Stability. Chaff is obviously not very stable. It blows away in the wind. Which means if you seek happiness apart from God, there will be a lack of rootedness to your life. Whatever’s popular; whatever is the culturally acceptable view on any issue, you’ll just kind of drift there. Nothing to hold onto; nothing to anchor you. No stability. But a tree—especially a tree planted near water—grows deep roots. And because it has a deep source of moisture, even when dry times come—even when there’s drought—the tree maintains stability and strength. Its leaves don’t wither. When we build a life of meditating on the Word, those truths become the well that we draw from. So in the dry times—like lying in a hospital bed, or reeling from a breakup, or facing unemployment, you don’t collapse. You become a stable person.  

And then secondly, you can see it Character. In the Bible, character is consistently compared to fruit. So your character is the fruit that your life produces. Chaff cannot produce fruit. Right? Because chaff is not a living, growing thing—it’s just a dry husk. But a tree is a living thing, and living things produce fruit. So here’s the promise: if you choose to seek your happiness in God, and you do that by meditating on His Word, you will develop a certain kind of character. In the New Testament, it’s described as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. In other words, the kind of person that all of us really want to be. 

Here's the bottom line: listening to the voice of God changes us. It gives us stability and character that we can’t get any other way.  

So…back to the unhappily married couple that I started the message with. The marriage was disappointing, not because the husband was a bad guy or a mean guy; he had just never learned how to listen. And when he did, everything started to change. I know that some of you have had a distant and cold relationship with God. But this week, you’re going to start listening. You’re going to set aside time to meet with God and meditate on the Word, and you’re going to be surprised to hear God speaking, directly, to you. It’s going to happen. And you will be changed.